Why Do Men Cheat in Happy Relationships? My 4 Big Reasons
I have recently found myself in a relationship with a girl that is everything I have ever wanted. She is young, attractive, innocent(was a virgin), sweet, honest and, most importantly, our personalities mesh flawlessly. Hundreds of girls and this girl stands out above the rest. She is the reason I got into learning game and now I have her. Then why do I have this overwhelming urge to cheat? Why do men cheat? Especially when those men are in the middle of a completely happy relationship.
I love talking to her and don’t have any desire to talk to any other girls. I love kissing her, touching her and just being around her. I love to go and do things with her, But I have this overwhelming desire to sleep with other women. Everywhere I look there are opportunities and every single time I want to jump on it.
I don’t want an emotional connection, I just want dirty, sweaty sex and nothing else. But why can’t I just be content with this amazing relationship that I have now? Here are my 4 reasons to answer the question: Why do men cheat in happy relationships:
Why do men cheat: Reason #1. Instinct
I don’t care what anybody tells you, men are not programmed to spend their entire lives with one woman. Men get a new, fresh load every 12 hours and our biological programming is not telling us to drop this in the same girl over and over and over and over and over and over again. This programming is telling us to spread our seed, to pass on our genetics with as many girls as possible. It is only current social programming that tells us we must not do that.
The Biological Imperative
The biological imperative basically says that all living things live for 2 reasons: Survive and reproduce. That’s it. A woman can only reproduce once every 9 months, but a man can reproduce more than once a day if he wants. If he follows his biological imperative he will first be thinking about survival and, afterwards, think only about reproducing.
How porn reinforces this
To understand what porn has to do with the question of why do men cheat, think back to the last few times you looked at pornography. Did you only watch one girl? It’s possible (if you are relationship starved to a ridiculous level), but chances are even during your last time beating off, you looked at more than one girl. All guys do this, even the guys that swear that they only want one woman. If they only want one woman, why are they looking at hundreds if not thousands of women online?
I used to be a part of a particular religion (not going to say which), but one thing I learned while part of this religion is that the most common problem that the most high up church leaders had was a… porn addiction. This reinforced my thinking that it is very difficult to go against your biological imperative.
“But 20 there are plenty of guys that stay loyal to one girl all their lives.” Yeah, there are. But most of those guys don’t have the opportunity to cheat with an attractive woman and still end up turning to porn.
Most guys have to work their asses off to get laid these days, if that weren’t the case, people would be cheating just as often as they are looking at porn. If a new busty blonde fell onto your bed every time you pushed a button (like turning on your computer), no guys would be able to stay loyal. This brings me to my next reason guys cheat: opportunity.
Why do men cheat: Reason #2. Opportunity
I think the second biggest reason that men cheat in happy relationships is opportunity. If a guy has only been able to bang one girl in his entire life, chances are good he’s not going to have many more of those opportunities and… isn’t going to cheat. However, if a guy has worked hard on himself and his game with women and feels comfortable seducing them, opportunities will show up everywhere. He will have to look into the big blue eyes of that tall blonde Russian girl from work and completely deny his biological programming, because he knows he could get a legit shot with her.
Opportunity is also important in terms of knowing that he can be with the girl and get away with it. He may absolutely love the girl and never risk messing it up with the girl until he sees an opportunity where she would never find out. These kind of opportunities can happen while on business trips or while traveling. There is no risk of running into these women ever again.
Another kind of opportunity is one that just happens and your instincts take over. When Arnold Schwarzenegger cheated on his wife with the maid, he wasn’t getting the prettiest woman he could get, he was getting the convenient woman. The same thing happened to Bill Clinton when he cheated on his wife. It was the secretary that was in a convenient location and their deeply written manly instincts just take over. These are not smart ways to cheat, but they aren’t thinking with the right head in those moments.
Why do men cheat: Reason #3. Habit
I for one have created a habit of getting a lot of new girls every month, when I stop getting these new incoming girls, I start to feel incomplete. This is something that can be broken, as it is simply a habit and lifestyle choice. However, breaking this habit is not an easy thing to do. When you have to break a habit that is connected to the amazing and exciting feeling you get every time you hook up with a new girl, you better hope the girl you are doing it for is worth it. A man has to really believe she is worth it, or breaking such a habit will be even more difficult.
Why do men cheat: Reason #4. Boredom/Something New
When you are with the same girl over and over again, eventually, things WILL start to get boring and you will want something new. The same thing will happen to her, it’s not either of your guys’ fault, it’s just the way human psychology and sexual psychology work. We crave new experiences and things that are new and exciting.
The exception would be people that don’t like to break out of their comfort zones and like the same thing over and over again. Although I do think that it is because they let fear lead their lives and not because it’s what they really want.
Men aren’t the only ones with urges to cheat
We have answered the question: why do men cheat? But that brings up another question: Why do women cheat? Men aren’t the only guilty parties. Women have urges to cheat. They have urges to sleep with a higher value man than their partner, they get bored after years of being with the same person as well. I know all too well that guys aren’t the only ones cheating from keeping a key logger on my laptop for the past 6 years. You can read about that here. In the dating game, nobody leaves with their hands completely clean. The problem is… it seems like my current girl has been completely honest with me. This makes me want to be loyal to her.
Why do men cheat? My temptations
I’m currently with an amazing girl and the temptations all around me are very strong. I’m not really sure what to do from here, but I do know I am going against the way I have been programmed as a man. I have no urge to have an emotional connection with any other girl on the planet, my girl is fulfilling that completely, but the urge to have sex with a new woman is remarkably strong. And the opportunities… here in Poland… they are plenty. But I do care about this girl so… we will see what happens.