The Approach Thread
#21
(06-02-2019, 04:19 PM)vybe Wrote: Cobra where is the bitterness. Maybe you should work on reading comprehension. I said I get women choosing me, and sometimes women approach me and hit on me. How can I be bitter about that? lol. I find that a blessing, since my smv is barely average at the moment. For that i'm grateful as can be. All I'm saying is don't waste your time with women that don't want you. It's simple. Especially in the #metoo era, more than ever. I'm not here to patronize anybody. But this pua telemarketing approach has a very autistic nature. You guy's need to make intuitive decisions when cold approaching, that's what i'm trying to reiterate.

Look man, I'm not trying to put you on the spot to you to defend yourself. Not at all. It's what I would call a constructive criticism. You have to learn to take it if you want to be better at anything, including game. A lot of guys have said what needs to be said, in a better manner than I can.

However, what I will do is give you my perspective of Inner Game, the piece that you may be lacking in this context. As you can tell, there is no science, formula or even experience that can indicate 100% that a woman is into you (or not). All that matters are the variables you can control which connect to the Inner Game aspect of your being. However, these controllable variables are not going to be adjusted by a guy that feels defeated by uncontrollable variables. This guy is you when you say you see indicators of women not being into you. That is bullshit as others have pointed out. Who cares? Approach her anyways. You may be surprised. Part of Inner Game and masculine development, whether in your career, or game, is to discard the mental effort provided to uncontrollable variables and rather focus them on the controllable ones. This includes fitness, number of approaches, fashion, and social effort.

You, vybe, need to tell yourself that you don't care about the women that do not want you. However, also tell yourself that you don't get to say that until you have made the maximum effort to adjust the controllable variables that can be in your favor. I have been through the mental rodeo enough times that I can speak to this confidently now. I hope this makes sense.
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#22
Well, saying i'm bitter is not constructive criticism, it's patronizing. But, ill let it pass. What you fail to realize this is not about "inner game". This is routed in strategy, and results. You claim there is no science or method to recognize that a women isn't interested in you. From my experiences, and human biology yes there is. There's always these obvious signs that women make to show a man she's interested. A couple are: strong eye contact, welcoming body language w/ congruent facial expressions, and heightened feminine behavior. These are based on my life experiences. Evolutionary biology has also spoken about this in great detail. Terms like natural selection, female hyper-gamy, indicators of sexual interest, and etc. You get my point. Women also display signs of not being interested in you. I have enough life experience to differentiate, and experience has taught me more than any internet theories ever will.

Attraction is not a choice.

What most guys lack is intuition to know when to cold approach and when you should not. I would only approach a women if my intuition is in alignment. Even if she is not looking at me, or showing signs of interest. All honesty, since I have options I don't care about women that have no interest in me. That's why I don't bother approaching. It's simple, only guys in my position can understand this. I have no interest in trying to win over a woman that has not interest in me. Why? because it comes from self worth, and respect. If she's not interested in me, she doesn't mean much to me. I like the power dynamic with women to favor me, that's why I wouldn't bother trying to win any woman over. My experiences with women that have pre-selected me, compared to the ones that have not. Have always been superior, every single time.

I agree 100% regarding controlled variables in-terms of money, career, looks, physique, and etc. All these should be maximized to get the best results in the game. But what works for you may not work for me, and vice versa. So I'll leave it at that.
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#23
Not all women act the same. Not as all men act the same.

My life experiences tells me men like sex with hot woman. Yet there are weirdos that don't.

There is not one shoe fits all here.

People and circumstances are different.

If you want to reach the highest level of self as a man, you do what the fuck you want regardless of what others think, say or do.
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#24
Night game; rolled out with my recently-divorced buddy and a friend of his who I met for the first time, a stoic military pilot.

Posted up at the corner of the bar and a group of 4 early-20's girls came through and ordered drinks next to me. As they waited for their drinks they milled around with low energy, swiping through Bumble on their phones. I tapped the blonde 7 on the shoulder and said, "you look like you're having more fun than anyone else here," she smiled and laughed.
Me: I get it, I know you guys came out to swipe through Tinder on your phone. I mean, why else do people come to bars?
Her: hahaha we are just waiting for our drinks
Me: For sure. You could totally fall in love while swiping, waiting for your drinks.
Her: hahahaha
Me: let me guess, you're from ____ (random city near us)
Her: no, I'm from _____ (city known for being a shit hole)
Me: Oh shit you're from ____ (I pat my pockets down frantically), just wanted to make sure I still had my wallet on me
Her: (punches me playfully and laughs) omg! not all parts of ____ are bad!
We get into animated, extended convo about the city she is from. She brings in her cute Mexican 7 friend to get her opinion, but then my recently-divorced buddy butts into the conversation with the blonde girl and before I know it, they have turned their backs on us, got their drinks and dispersed. I debriefed with him later on how to wing better.

We went to a country club and nobody was approaching. I got fed up and saw two young blonde girls walk over to a table and sit by themselves. I walked past them, turned around and used the same opener: You guys look like you're having more fun than anyone else here. They were both about the same, blonde 7's.
Girl 1: hahahaa well its her first time here, but its kind of dead tonight

I forget the details of the convo but they were very young, I think they said they were 18 or 19. They had the big X's on their hands preventing the bar staff from serving them alcohol. Girl 1 was somewhat talkative but I was holding the attention of both of them, and the second girl didn't have much to say. I segued into "let me guess, you're from___" which led them to guess where I was from (incorrectly), then I bullshitted a little more but realized they were both sitting while I was sitting/squatting next to their table. I wasn't feeling the vibe so I politely ejected.

We bounced back to the original bar, laid around for a bit and eventually two young white girls walked in, one was about a 6.9 wearing a red sun dress with no bra, and I think wedge heels. They sidled up next to us at the bar to order their drinks. The 6.9 was a cute 22-year old brunette with brown eyes and firm muscles, but not masculine looking.

I tapped her on her bare shoulder and used the exact same opener as before. Except this time she LOCKED in with me and were we going back and forth, giving each other shit, getting to know each other, and really engaging in playful, fun conversation. The CLUTCH move here was my buddy coming to his senses, swooping in and occupying the girl's overweight friend while my girl and I conversed. We were in our own little world and I had her full attention.
After we were vibing for a bit I was getting ready to number close her. They were just coming into the bar and starting their night, so I didn't have any faith in a SNL. My energy was coming way down. A moment before I did, she said "omg I see a friend I know, sorry!" and she runs off across the bar, hugs some hipster looking dude and completely engages in convo with him. Her friend joined her shortly and my buddy and observed as they both engaged in jovial conversation and shot-ordering with this dude they knew. Fuck, so close!

Overall I am very pleased with my progress. As someone who does not like drinking or night game in general, I am getting better at hooking sets. I was not a machine with approaching like I should be. Over the course of 2 hours out, I only approached 3 sets but two of them stuck, one of them REALLY stuck.

I am getting better at rambling about topics and just bullshitting with girls and guys alike. I told the brunette that I loved her outfit, which was true, I did. I told her how "I saw a girl at the bar a moment prior who was wearing flip flops, leggings and a hoodie. So when girls put effort into their appearance, I really notice it.". She seemed to like receiving my genuine compliment.

My buddy is down to go out again tomorrow night (Saturday) so I'm going to play it by ear, go to jiu-jitsu and do errands, maybe spit some day game and see how my energy is come nightfall.
There's no such thing as different but equal. 
-Dante Nero
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#25
Day game, mall approaches

Saw a cute blonde 7, short and curvy with black leggings and thick legs with a fat ass. She was walking through the mall as I approached her the opposite direction. Used the "do you know another mall around here?" opener. She stopped walking to talk to me but she didn't bit on my bait and didn't seem too into having a random chat with a strange guy. Good eye contact though, she was very attractive. I could have rambled a lot more though, either about malls, where I come from, differences in the environment, etc. I didn't ramble much at all after the first bait drop.

Next!

Saw a petite, young white girl 6.5 with brown hair and braces walking towards the escalator. I positioned myself at the corner near the escalator and stopped her with the same opener. She briefly stopped to answer me, then apologized and departed the interaction.

Next!

I saw a thin, young black girl, 6.5-7.0, standing outside a jewelry store with her OBESE friend. I pondered the situation, wishing the cute girl was alone, lamenting the logistics of it. Could I approach her with the fat friend right there?

Then the gods intervened and the fat girl wobbled inside the jewewlry store, leaving the cute one unattended outside, playing on her phone. I walked past her briefly, turned and delivered my opener.

me: excuse me, do you know another mall around here? Like a better mall?

She answered warmly and was very talkative! She chatted a million miles per minute though and I think she was nervous, because she was talking so damn fast. I thought it was so cute. I deliberately slowed my speech rate down to try and adjust her, and it worked as she slowed her own cadence as well. I dropped my "where I come from" bait, she asked where I was from and I had her guess. She gave rich answers and dropped her own small pieces of bait about where she is from, where she has lived etc etc. Got her laughing a little bit and high-fived her on something she said. She was enjoying the interaction. Her eyes were big and pretty and her lips were big and luscious.

Her fat friend wobbled out of the store and hovered around us for a moment, then another fat friend appeared! I was a little weary, but our conversation was so lively and fun that I think the fat girls saw their friend having such a good time that they backed off and disappeared. Awesome!

I ran GALNUC from Roosh's Day Bang book and got her age (19 years old, for reference I am a 30-year old white guy) and found out she lives about 18 minutes from my house. I wrapped it up by saying, "well, I'm going to get back to searching for a pet store but I was going to say you seem cool, do you want to hang out sometime?" she said "sure" and I said "I'll take your number". I punched her digits in and texted her 2 hours later.

Me: yo _blackgirlname_ it was good meeting you today. -checkmat
she responded back 15 minutes later
Her: Hey!! it was good meeting you too

She said she is free on the weekends so I will go for a date this weekend or maybe next week sometime.

One thing I could have done differently here is how I number closed. Instead of ASKING, I should have said "you seem cool, we should hang out sometime".
There's no such thing as different but equal. 
-Dante Nero
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#26
Me and SpecialEd went to do some day game at a big mall today, but it wasn't that busy. I was hoping to spot some cute girls working. But didn't see any that caught my eye. No opens for either of us. Will try a different place on Friday.

I was planning to run this stack

Hey how are you?

Do you know where the bookstore is?

Are you a student?

blah blah blah

I am trying to learn some Vietnamese. Let's get coffee sometime. Put your zalo number in my phone (or what's your zalo number)

SpecialEd was thinking of going direct ie

Hey I thought you were cute. Let's hangout sometime. Whats your number?
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#27
There really was a dearth of targets today. Must have been because it was working hours, or maybe that mall we went to just sucks lol.

I think Dash's indirect approach will get far more traction with Viet girls..I just want to go direct because a) it's entertaining b) it filters the girls most down for it. I can line up coffee dates or language exchange on facebook. With day game, you've got the advantage of body language and eye contact. So I think one can afford to be more direct than online. Guess we'll see how that plays out.

We'll hit up Vincom on friday. Lots of hotties there.
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#28
Went to a concert Friday and got legit blown out 3 times in a row. Like...the girls physically walked off. That has never happened to me.

Sounds stupid to say it, but it was great. My friends and I just laughed about it. And I am reminded that it's all about having a good time. And making good stories.
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#29
Made a couple day approaches today, been rusty.

20y high 6 super short long haired blonde, good body - went indirect, wasn't ready to banter.

Another saw her from 30 yards. Tall, good body, long light brunette big sunglasses. Couldn't see age til after I went with the excuse me to get her attention while walking. Tell her she's cute, ask her name. She takes off her sunglasses she is probably late 20s, Julia Roberts look-a-like bitch, decently pretty most guys put in her in the 7 zone. Boyfriend answer strong immediately, at least it looked like she enjoyed the flirty approach.

Usually after about 5-10 day approaches the rust wears off and I start having fun with it. I swear to God I am gonna fit my middle name routine into one of these first chance I can!
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#30
Grocery store getting booze for the 4th of July. Noticed a pony-tailed late 20s brunette looking like she was ready for a music festival. Short jean shorts, tank. Looked like a girl that likes to drink beer and fuck. Like a quinessential FWB situation.

6.5 face 6.5 body nice blue eyes cute smile.

First went to self check out, they don't let you buy booze there. Had the blonde attendant 30y 7.5 face 7 body. Should have made a comment or gone on a ramble and caught her there. Didn't, my bad. Went over to the normal check out line. Girl in question is behind me. She puts her 12 pack of fruity mixer can stuff behind mine. I open if she mixes that with her gin bottle. She replied it's beer. Guess there are multi pack flavor fruit canned beer? Anyways she asks about the vodka and ginger beer I got. Talked about drinks. I stopped the conversation because it was my turn at the cash register soon and she kept it going. Also had the cashier woman card me, had a few laughs about that because I misinterpreted her questions on purpose.

Brunette wished me a happy 4th when I had my bags. I went off to the side to wait for her to check out from a distance, she was going out the other door.

Hurry, leave my cart outside the opposite door, she turns to walk toward me after exiting, walk right at her she sees me approaching phone in hand. I go for the number right away, she replies she has a boyfriend right away. Enjoyed the flirting and glad I keep going for it in everyday situations. I've never had the desire to break through a I have a boyfriend reply especially when it sounds very genuine and upfront. When instead it can be mentioned much later in an approach, or even better if she mentions it by text when you ask her out for the first time - those are easier to play with.

However I should still have had the plan the get her number either way and stick her on a mass text once every few months plate potential list which I really need to change to. I've never been a collecting lottery tickets for the long game guy, it couldn't hurt though.

Didn't tell her that I bet she doesn't have a middle name. Damn.
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#31
Tl; Dr: Number 10/10.  Bang TBD.

Grocery store.  Mid-morning.  Waiting in line.  Some 7/10 college aged girl behind me with a basket in her hand.  Two patrons of the store in front.  The man and his wife getting ringed up seemingly having enough for a huge bbq (ribs, vegetables, beef, hotdogs, breads, etc.)

* I begin to look at the stuff in my cart, examining labels

* I turn to the girl behind me and ask if she's had this stuff before (it was an instant miso soup mix that I've had countless times before since I was a teen).  Basically comfort food for me... if done up right.

* She says no and I say it's good... for hangovers (with a nearly unpredictable wink)

* She seems a bit dismayed and says that she is not hung over

* I respond that I didn't think she was and that I was just saying.  I begin to tell her about how the salts in the soup activate the saliva glands and make the mouth water... which is good since it makes one want to drink water.. which is the key, along with rest, to ending a hangover.

* At that point she was looking at my cart and says "I don't like vodka."

* I reply, "Did I ask you?" She scoffs meekly and says "no. I just thought..."  I look into her basket and remark: "Making a salad today, eh."  She smiles and looks at the head of the line... in a color I would call anodized blue...

* I look where she is looking, note it, then scan the candy.  I ask her, "Do you like candy?"

* Time is up.  My turn in line.  I greet the checker woman by name.  I know her from many years of shopping at this store.  She states, "Double bag for all that, Mr. RNR."  "Of course,"  I reply and look at the new bagger boy -- some dual-diamond earring gayboy.  (I almost feel like asking him if he knows who Suicidal Tendencies are, but I relent, in wisdom, and don't.)  I tell him to "double bag the heavy stuff"... figuring the new boy is at least worth a test.  The cashier nods at him to do it.

* I roll my eyes to the girl behind me and insert my card into the machine that accepts it with a bell.

* Preempting the inevitable, I ask the girl behind me: "Would you like help out to your car with that?" with a nice smile and an overly ingratiating voice.

* Again, she just stares and has no more to say and just hovers there on the edge of a smile.  Was that a memory in the flicker of her eyes?

* I take my groceries that the new boy packed, having been ripped off at this store before, and nod.  I do not say "thanks" since his volumetric geometry planning is obviously not what it should be and I know I will have to stop before I exit the store and rearrange everything.

* So I stop by the charcoal and chips near the way out and begin to rearrange my supplies.

* The girl from before begins to approach my position and pass.  I suddenly ask: "How are your bags, lady?"

* She laughs with a lilt to me and says, "I am not a bag lady! See?"

* And I see.  She is using some new day nylon shopping handbag.  I ~gawk~ at it :-)

Conversation ensues and we talk about how easy her bag must be to carry all the way out to our cars.  I get her number, almost as an afterthought.  I told her something like: "Take my number for emergency purposes."

The whole thing ended with me inspecting how her bag was in her trunk (is this balanced for your drive home?) and then wishing her well on her way.

Needless to say... I still have a smile on my face. 

I am still refraining from asking if she got home okay.  I will text her on Tuesday to see how the rest of her day/weekend went.  (I'm thinking, netflix and declawed cats.)
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#32
How do you guys sustain momentum when running daygame? I'm finding it increasingly difficult to get out there an take the beatings as I get older. Maybe I am just being lazy.
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#33
(07-08-2019, 01:57 PM)churros Wrote: How do you guys sustain momentum when running daygame? I'm finding it increasingly difficult to get out there an take the beatings as I get older. Maybe I am just being lazy.

I'm pushing 50 later this year, so... Personally, I don't really make a big deal out of it.  I don't go to special places and "post up".  I just keep open and vibing wherever I am at, whether day or night.  I typically use what would be considered indirect game and make silly comments to good looking young ladies about something happening or in the environment and see if they are game or not.  I only go for more if its basically a sure shot -- which I can usually tell after a brief laugh and a chat.

A couple of examples:

* at the local pharmacy buying booze (vsop brandy).  Nice looking young chick (a 7 with a nice tight ass and a decent rack) in front of me buying booze (a bottle of Jamesons).  I tell her this is what I'm buying and express that I hope she isn't planning on drinking her stuff alone in a darkened room.  Got the laugh.  Did not get the number and I did not chase her outside to ask if she wanted to share our booze together... so that we didn't both fall into suicidal depression... which is where I was attempting to lead things in line if she didn't ring through so fast.

* out at a local bar sitting at a table waiting for my wing to get back from the john.  A gaggle of 23-30 y/o girls at the bar talking about something that I think was a "fuck em and forget em" sort of thing. I lean to the cute brunette and act shocked.  I tell her I'm not eve's dropping but I thought I heard her say... she tries to explain it all away innocently but I push forward on that angle.  I get the laugh and the "you are a jokester" forearm tap.  I ask her if she smokes, she says yeah, and we move out front.  The crux of the convo was her asking me how old I was.  I asked her "how old is too old for you?"  She said 40.  I said I'm 39 with a slight wink.  We pretty much spent the entire rest of the night together at the bar.  I ended up banging her a few days later after texting her about this and that every so often. The finality of it was that it turned out to be a nice little STR. She was 27 and a degree holding marine biologist. I often inquired of her to regale me with the exploits of her hot mermaid friends.
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#34
(07-08-2019, 08:55 PM)Max RNR Wrote: I asked her "how old is too old for you?"  She said 40.  I said I'm 39 with a slight wink. 

Stealing this line!
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#35
A few nights ago there was a blonde on the bus that's going to the same direction as home, decided to finally have the balls to slide from my side of the bus right up to her side of the bus and into the seat in front of her and chatted her up.
It was very late past midnight and we're both tired and as much as I like same night lays it'd be completely awkward like getting off at the same stop and following her home at least without building significant rapport.
Got her snapchat to trade snaps the next day to hint at a venue to go to but as she had to run her errands so I'll have to put it off until next time.
Dodgy

While the next night another girl had the shittiest attitude who thought I was going to her workplace or some shit chatting her up. No point continuing with that.
Angry

(07-08-2019, 01:57 PM)churros Wrote: How do you guys sustain momentum when running daygame? I'm finding it increasingly difficult to get out there an take the beatings as I get older. Maybe I am just being lazy.

As I go on my normal day I don't expect anything and then out of nowhere I spot a chick that's my type and go right up for the approach anyway.

No point getting pumped up for a so-called daygame session as it should be an evergreen activity.

Sleepy
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#36
(07-09-2019, 12:18 PM)JekyllAndhyde Wrote:
(07-08-2019, 01:57 PM)churros Wrote: How do you guys sustain momentum when running daygame? I'm finding it increasingly difficult to get out there an take the beatings as I get older. Maybe I am just being lazy.

As I go on my normal day I don't expect anything and then out of nowhere I spot a chick that's my type and go right up for the approach anyway.

No point getting pumped up for a so-called daygame session as it should be an evergreen activity.

Sleepy

You only need a good day and/or night plan... going places and doing things, for yourself.  Opportunities will naturally arise.  Like the old saying affords: showing up is half the battle.

For example: I sometimes paint on canvas with oils and make candles out of non-colorized or scented bee's wax.  This puts me at the art stores every so often when I have a project in mind.  And getting to the art stores, if I decide to bike or bus, is obviously a whole different adventure... as The Fixx once sang: one thing leads to another.
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#37
Yesterday on the bus:

Middle eastern looking girl with big tits. Chatted her up, early 20s. Had other things to do so couldn't set up bang. She claimed she didn't have social media. Wouldn't exchange numbers.

I'm pretty shy but earlier the day I was having a hot streak in other parts of my life. I'm finding if you win in life it will cross over in other parts of your life like your dating life. No biggie. I said in the Thailand thread I'm heading out there next year. I'm due.
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#38
Earlier today, I got off of "work" early, so I decided to traipse downtown.

There is an airport bus stop there that I frequently walk by.  There was a nice young lady there who was not my style, but I figured wtf... let's have a laugh and we will both do better tomorrow.

I approach and say: Are you coming or going?

She says: going.

I say with a low voice: let me know when you are coming ;-)

I got the laugh and did not ask for her number.  I just kept on walking.  Her accent was not natural to this area and I was not really going for it.  It was fun tho.

However, about the store chick from right before that...
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#39
Locked down and not gaming so much anymore these days but here's a few from the last trip out. NYC

Gorgeous olive skin, long light brown/blond hair with highlights sitting in a bakery. Walked in and wasn't going to buy anything but decided to get something to sit by her and give it a shot. Took a seat, no acknowledgement. Few bites in she seemed to be packing up her laptop so opened with "almost as good as beard Papa's huh?" Smiled but looked quizzical "I don't know what that that is. Is that pistachio?" "well it was supposed to be three different things from three different people and actually turned out to be Hazelnut which was the only one I didn't want, but still pretty good." Talked for a few, I made some comment about hippies, she rolled her eyes. Turned out to be very conservative, from west coast here for school, model (of non-IG variety even!). She was testing hard but took a number to take her to Beard Papa's someday. [Went out next day, I was beat and our personalities weren't compatible so didn't go great. She is still a virgin at 26 and plans to remain so until marriage, and definitely a sexy little thing. Guessed my age as 40ish, and still very willing to go out when told her I was 36. Will make a more agreeable person a good wife someday...]

Decent-looking brunette sitting at end of bar with guy to her right, watch through window for a moment but they obviously weren't together. Was going to eat elsewhere but went inside and sat down. Open with talking about going for ramen but not being able to resist pork belly tacos. Talk for a while, lawyer few years older than me but nice shape. Asked if she had a man in state she was from, she had one coming to visit from another state - as we spoke. Got her number just before he showed up and left soon after he did. Will hit her up on next trip down.

Smoking little black girl on street, late teens early twenties, bubble butt in a tight dress. Turned out to be a pro, that's a first.
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#40
Walking by Best Buy saw a cute young girl looking at phones. Went in pause by TVs then walked over. Looked for a few seconds, then open with "time for an upgrade for you too?" Talked about phones for a minute and transitioned into more personal topics she was a senior in high school, 18, but definitely seemed interested. Someone stepped between us and she waited there waiting to re-engage, which I did.

People were all around so was I waiting for it to clear out to go for the number and then a sales guy came over and started talking to her, and they went over to the sales desk and after waiting around for awhile I had to engage another sales guy so as not to set off creeper alarms, and while he was in the middle of a spiel she walked out. Missed it, should've powered through and gone for it with an audience. Out of practice. Bunch of awkward blowouts when dealing with girls this young lately but this one was into it, and lost it because of ego.
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