We’ve been getting some great feedback and questions. I try to answer all of them with care, but since some of these question might be interesting for everyone, we’ll set up this new series called Reader Mail.
I’ll pick out some interesting questions and post them (anonymously).
For the first post of these series we’ll address 3 different questions… Let’s see what our carrier eagle dropped off.
I have been pipelining on the Philippine dating sites and it’s been only a week and like 10 of these chicks are already deeply in love with me.
It’s hilarious that they are already so possessive and jealous trying to keep tabs on me when I’m online.
My problem is the guilt after I bang them and leave them. Any tips on how to get a different mindset and overcome this impending guilt when I totally break their hearts?
One thing you should know is that many of these girls are acting real innocent but if you’d only have a look at their inbox or Facebook accounts, you might see them in a completely different light. Fisto and me have discovered this on multiple occassions in the Philippines. We would have the same girl chatting with us (she was unawere of it) and she would be lying her pants off to both of us. I’m not saying there are no really “good girls” on these dating sites, but a lot of them that are just very good at SEEMING innocent and sweet. So don’t fall into that trap.
I’ve experienced some pretty bad scenarios… A girl that’s calling her boyfriend over the phone while she blowing me everytime she paused talking. I couldn’t help thinking “poor fellow”.
Another way to look at it is: you’re not banging them and leaving them. You’re providing them an experience. If you have solid game, good inner game and a strong frame, you will raise the bar for them. Next time they won’t be happy with some average dude they can walk all over and who’s just buying them shit and whom they’ll make wait for sex for a month. These fellows are not satisfying these girls, they’re only providing for them.
In summary, do your own thing and don’t feel bad about it, these girls are doing their own thing and you can bet they won’t give it a second thought either.
hey man, found your blog two weeks ago and love it. Great trip report on Japan. I especially liked the let’s buy some sake close you used to get her back to her place.
You referenced it was a variant of “let’s buy some water” close – how does that one go? Couldn’t find it searching your site.
I’m interested because I’ve got a girl that lives with me, but I’m dating a few things on the side. Logistics is my main challenge, so any good excuses to get them back to their place would be golden
Thanks very much,
The “water close” is something I used a lot in Thailand and Philippines. After meeting a girl in the club or at a bar, if I felt she would be down to take home I’d say “Let’s go buy some water outside” (that makes sense because it’s expensive to buy in the club/bar). Then I would buy the biggest bottle they have at the nearest 7/11 so it’s clear I’m not gonna finish it there, then take a taxi and go to my place. It smoothens things out to retreat her to you place.
You know what’s going on, she knows it, but you can’t say “let’s go to my room and fuck”. It is all about giving the girl plausible deniability. It’s pretty rare that a girl will invite you to her place, the conditions have to be right so she can keep denying what’s going on. You will have to improvise on the spot.
In your case you could apply the same strategy and pretend your going to your place but instead have the taxi drive you to a hotel.
Hey what up THC!
I had a look at your website and I’m pretty impressed. I do have a few questions/comments that I’d like to share with you.
I’m wondering where I should get started with improving my game with women.
I don’t necessarily want to be a player or a pick-up artist, but I do want to find someone to settle down with and have a steady girlfriend. I think if I improve my game it’d give me the best chance to find my dream girl.
I’ve had to often settle for less attractive women who annoy the hell out of me. I do believe I deserve better, which is also what everyone who knows me tells me on a regular basis. I’m ready to do something about it.
Everyone tells me I have a nice smile. But yeah I’ve always been known as a “good guy”.
I’ve noticed that I don’t really get rejected all that much. I think I’ve gotten rejected by women maybe a handful of times. I think my problem just stems from a lack of confidence in approaching women and stuff, and well it’s tough because I do fear rejection and I’m shy around women I find attractive.
I’ve been able to score a few dates with attractive women, some of which have done some modeling, but it never turns into something steady (which is what leads me to settling with the uglier chicks).
It’s just totally different when dealing with the attractive women because they have dudes lined up left and right, and they won’t hesitate to drop you if you don’t meet their standards or if they find something wrong with you for whatever reason.
So anyways, my question is, how should I get started so that I can improve my game with women.
That’s a pretty broad question.
I will suggest you 2 things to start with, you need to improve your FRAME (your core believes about yourself) and your BODY LANGUAGE.
To get that hot girl of your dreams you need to have a very solid FRAME that is attractive for women, not only to seduce her but even more so to KEEP her. To seduce and to keep hot girls, that like you say, have dudes lined up, you NEED to work on your game and improve your frame.
You need to change your frame from the “good guy” and be the “attractive guy”, the guy that is comfortable being around and interacting with attractive women. The high quality girls will sense immediately if you are not used to interacting with or dating with hot girls. This can only be achieved through practice & repetition.
Although you don’t want to be a player, going out there “looking for a girl to settle down with” is not the right frame to attract women. You need to stop valueing women so much and go out there and try to smash as many girls as you can. Then if you meet a cool girl along the way that you like: even better.
You will learn from each interaction, get rid of your fear of rejection and this will help you build up your frame as an attractive guy that can get any girl he wants.
The fact that you’ve not been rejected a lot shows that you’ve been staying in your comfort zone. Like any skill you need to leave your comfort zone in order to improve.
This is linked to your frame, with a solid frame it will come naturally and your confidence will radiate through and girls will pick up on this. But you can start working on your body language right now.
So read Fisto’s posts on double your game (part 1 & 2 are stickie on the front page of the blog), apply the scientist mentality and get started.
That’s it for this week’s reader mail. As always, if you have any burning questions or suggestions for a new blog post, let us know. Drop a comment down below or send us an email: firstname.lastname@example.org or email@example.com