One Weird Month in Cali

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Medellin Hardcore

Colombia is easily one of my favourite countries in the world. And Medellin is one of my favourite cities in Colombia. The city has a lot to offer and is very different from barrio to barrio. From ‘the centre’ to Laureles to El Poblado, each part of the city has it’s own charm.

I was staying right on Parque Lleras, gringo- and party central of the city. A little bit too close to the action for my own good. It got a bit out of hand and let’s just say I found out why it’s a bad idea to mix uppers and downers (and alcohol) on a near daily basis. It really fucked with my system.

parque-lleras

Parque Lleras, Medellin

I had an awesome time though and I met some of favourite girls during this times. Hot looks & fun personalities. But when my month lease of my apartment was over I decided I needed to detox for a while.

Cali was the last big city I still had to check out. So the next morning I took the overnight bus. 20Nation and Scotian had already stayed at an apartment there, so I just booked the same place.

Detoxing

I went cold turkey from day one. No more drugs, no more alcohol, no more junk food. I had a tough time coming down. I didn’t sleep the first week, I was feeling like shit. I got extremely anti-social and my productivity dropped to zero.

The only thing positive during these first weeks was my focus on sports and eating healthy. I knew I just had to ride it out and suck it up until I started feeling better again, but I made to commitment to myself that no matter what I would do 1 or 2 hours of sports a day and eat healthy food.

Going cold turkey and the lack of sleep completely killed my sex drive (and work drive) during the first week. I was still horny but I couldn’t be bothered to go out on a first date, I dreaded the effort of being social.

Getting Better

I started using ColombianCupid, a local dating site, as an experiment. The site works surprisingly well. There are cute girls to be found and it seems a lot easier to meet up with them than with Tinder girls, whom generally are pretty flakey.

On that site I found a girl that wanted to come straight to my place. I had a bad experience before with meeting a girl from the internet straight at my place, so my guards were up but everything worked out perfectly.

She was no top shelf material but she was young and cute. More importantly, it got me out of my funk. She showed up in high heels and with a tight dress. She seems very shy from chatting with her online but she was totally different in person. She was talking a lot from the moment she stepped out of the taxi and she didn’t shut up until I got her in my bed.

She had the smoothest skin and the tightest pussy. It was really great sex.

The Week of Fetishes

After her and by continuing my daily sport and nutrition routine, I was slowly moving back to my baseline. I was starting to feel better and my drive came back again. But suddenly I was getting an impulse of fetishes.

Maybe it was an uncontrollable desire for variety. My girls from Medellin were model types: tall, skinny and young.

Now my new fetish was big butts and milfs.

B.O.O.T.Y.

First, I wanted the biggest booty I could find in Cali. Luckily Colombia is the perfect place to get stuck with this fetish. Again, ColombiaCupid delivered. A huge advantage over Tinder is that you can search on body type (breast size, hip width) on age, on ethnicity, etc.

I found a black girl who, looking from her profile pics, had exactly what I was looking for. I set up date with her near my place. When she arrived and got out of the taxi: Wow, I was not disappointed. Even better that I had hoped for. She had a tiny waist but her ass and her legs were HUGE. Perfect for my fix.

As I walked into the bar some guys were looking at us, they knew exactly what this was about. She was actually a lot of fun. We had a couple of drinks and I took her to my place. It was a glorious moment when I took off her pants, they got stuck halfway down her butt (hallelujah!).

Great sex. She told me I was the first gringo she had ever been with. Her friends had been telling her gringos are shit in bed. Glad to have set that straight for her. You’re welcome, next gringo.

M.I.L.F.

My next fetish was to date a milf (around 35 years old). I quickly found one online (thank you ColombiaCupid!) who had big fake tits AND a big ass. The date was really shitty though. She was quite awkward. But looking at those tits and that ass, I powered through it, I kept gaming her and finally made out in the bar and took her home.

She was giving up a lot of LMR (Last Minute Resistance); no surprise since she had made clear from the start that wasn’t looking for a one night stand. But once we were making out in bed, she got too horny herself and the resistance disappeared.

The fake tits were decently done. But the surprise of the night was that her ass was fake too. It’s the second fake ass I’ve had in Colombia. The first one was cool as a novelty experience but now… I have to say, they can make great fake tits but I’m not a fan of the fake butts.

It looks great in clothing, it looks a lot less when she’s naked and it just feels weird. After sex I kicked her out, I had no connection with her and her fake butt was a disappointment. Never heard from her again.

Looking back

This was such a weird month for me, with the recovery, my anti-socialness, lack of drive… but I’m glad I recovered. The consequence is that I can’t really judge Cali as I didn’t give it fair change. I didn’t do any nightlife and I hardly ventured out of a 5 block radius from my apartment.

Just food, sports and sleep. I think the city has a lot more potential than what I’ve gotten from it. To be sure, I will have to come back one day.

Lessons learned from this weird month:

  • Health: Know your moderation when it comes to living the party lifestyle.
  • Fake asses: Not as good as fake tits.

Peace,

THC

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About the Author

TravelHardcore

I’m TravelHardcore, but people simply call me THC, although I don’t smoke. I speak several languages and suffer from insomnia. I left a well paying job, stuck in a miserable office to go out and see the world. I simply live for adventure. Cheers.

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  • Cecil J

    Do you feel anti social whilst living in Western Europe? Is Eastern Europe more social and better nightlife than Western Europe?

    • No, I dont usually feel anti social. This was purely drugs, alchohol and medication related. I dont recommend mixing. Feeling a lot better now. Eastern Europe I have a lot more fun, people are very open and social. General good, easy going vibe, easy to meet people and make new friends.

  • Pete

    Cocaine is a hell of a drug. Take mushrooms instead.

  • Bat

    I just have been in Cali and I was expecting a different post than this. To be honest, I really liked this article, because it’s totally authentic and honest. In the last weeks I didn’t visit this page that often like in the past. I found the articles too focused on all the positive aspects of travelling, I got the feeling that everything works so easy for you guys and it was always “came in this country, met her, banged her, next girl, …” Maybe that’s true when you guys all are like Adonis with great game, but more realistic is that you also have bad moments like you described what happened to you after Medellin. That honesty is what I really love about Roosh V’s (older) articles, where he admits for example how frustrating daygaming can be or what his bang ratio is etc. or all his book “dead bat in Paraguay” is brutal honest about all the negative aspects of our often idealized image of travelling. I know you guys are making a lot of thoughts about the future of STW and my honest opinion is that this authentic way is the key. There are a lot of invented or at least “improved” lay reports about travelling in the internet, and if you always post how easy everything goes there is the possibility that people begin to doubt them (don’t get me wrong, I don’t say they are not real). To distinguinsh from such fake reports, I recommend you to be more authentic, for example making Q&A’s like Roosh or the little series from naughtynomad in Africa. Last but not least I want you guys to thank for your efforts and good work, keep it up dudes!

    • Hey Bat, thanks for the feedback. Besides every success and crazy adventure there are failures, rejections, fuck-ups, flakes, waisted time and bad nights. I wrote about this in another post on “expectation management”.

  • Scotian

    Maybe I shouldn’t have introduced you guys to cocaine at that strip club in Guadalajera?

  • Fernando

    @TravelHardcore:disqus you have a contact e-mail address? I’m talking to a black chick with a huge ass from colombian cupid I’m suppose to meet up with. I just want to confirm its not the same chick. So far she has the biggest ass in Cali and is black.

    With all due respect I want to make sure I’m not getting seconds haha.

  • Andy

    ive read that there are many caucasian people in medeжin, compared to other parts of colombia. any truth to this?
    in which colombian city are the girls most likely to put out? thanks

    • Yeah it’s true. You will see a lot more gringos in Medellin compared to other places. Especially around Lleras.
      They say Medellin is harder but from the places I’ve visited there’s not one place that’s day & night difference in easiness